After flying for almost a year and a half I was confronted with something I never had to deal with before. Missing something important to me due to my work hours. We all go through this in any career but especially flight attendants we're asked in detail from day one in our interview "are you willing to check the box for missing holidays and moving to any city?" In my mind though accepting this career I weighed out missing all the important-to-the-rest-of-the-world holidays, Christmas and the like for the next 15-20 years, if I'm lucky. It was the idea that I could make the randomly scheduled family reunions or precariously timed baby/bridal showers, hopefully some weddings. Well this week I am missing a family gathering, I helped plan and supplied air travel for none the less. In sitting and stewing (truthfully sulking) it occurred to me that there are moments to feel all of the feelings and move on, others on the far end of the spectrum for deeper feelings are best coped with over month maybe years. Upon realizing these are just mild negative feelings that should not weigh down my day or even week, still I could not shake it. Then I got off the couch, became productive, stretched a little, reorganized some of my apartment, repacked for whatever trip scheduling has for me this week, then I wrote. Processing feelings, to any magnitude even the little itty bitty ones we can justify tossing to the side with just mild logic, deserve our attention. How else are we able to solve the root of the problem without digging for it? In this situation it was my realization this was just the very first important-to-me event I am missing. All the positive perspective reminders I can dose myself up with wouldn't let me shake the sad I had to feel in order to feel grateful again. Sometimes it's a realization that can get you out of a funk. Any and all of the feels though; feel them. In a generation growing out of the idea that we need to bottle up our feelings and hide them away and just cope with them on a rainy day. I thought it would be good to share the mild side of that for all the articles and quotes about depression this is miles apart from that but it's the little things in life and the baby steps that get us back to the big picture perspective. Keep finding those outlets, writing, dancing, swimming, singing, exploring, whatever makes your heart sing even if the music has stopped temporarily you know the beat will always be there, create again and again until that song comes back because it will. It always does.